Kevin

I’ve been wandering now for a quite many years,
Mostly I’ve stumbled in dark.
I’ve tripped over beautiful, pretty and plain.
None have deserved a remark.

And just at the moment my body was worn,
I tripped on a damaged, old soul.
Under my breath, I scoffed at the sight
And brushed him back under the knoll.

It wasn’t a minute ’til I turned around
Examining him once again
That I noticed his hands were worn to the bone
And his face showed more lines than most men.

He said with a voice in a kind, gentle way
“Please hammer the last coffin nail.
For I am not worth but the dust where I lay
And I have a sad, lonely tale.

“A lifetime ago, I was sturdy and young
Enough that the crowds would all stare.
I picked a fair maiden and built her a castle
And bought her the fine things to wear.

“She took all my years, my wealth and my tears
And left me with two empty hands.
I’m old and I’m grey, and here’s where I lay
And now I’m a shell of a man.”

But what I could see was what others had passed.
His heart that was made of pure gold…
Granted, it’s hidden with dirt and some grime
And some tarnish that came with the cold.

His heart was in pieces, and some on the ground
Were scattered where he couldn’t find.
I tried to assist and gathered them up
Then asked him if he wouldn’t mind

Walking beside me while I shuffled on
The path that I wandered upon.
He said he would gladly, and got to his feet.
We walked in the warmth of the sun.

The miles that we walked seemed to lighten each day…
The effortless laughter and smiles!
He told me his story, and I told him mine,
Assembling his heart all the while.

I knew I could trust him and opened my chest
To show him my own shattered heart.
He winked and he hugged me and pulled me up close
And pulled out an old, rusty dart.

But then came a day where the path merged to two
And he needed to go to the right.
He let go my hand and waved once again.
Holding back tears was a fight.

I found that my strength was returned as I went
To the left as I needed to go.
But, I’ll tell you a secret if you want to hear,
If you promise to not tell him so.

I took this one piece of my own shattered heart
And put it where his piece was gone
So that he could hold his head high once again
And remember the tune of his song.

But as I looked down at my once shattered mess
Thinking that I was so smart,
I found all my holes were not holes anymore…
He fixed it with parts of his heart.


The End

I want him to watch as I walk in the room,
And see no one else but just me.
I want him to study the shape of my hand
As he touches it delicately.
I want him to fein at the sound of my voice
And hang on my lips as I talk.
I want him to ache when I leave for a bit
And let me hold on as I walk.
I want him to reach out to me in the night
Wanting me ever so close.
I want him to giggle forgetting the hours
I want him to love me the most.
I want him to see every crack on my face
And see every scar in my heart.
But act like I’m perfect and smile with his eyes
And swear we will not be apart.
And then I awoke from my fairytale dream
And recalled that there never has been
Someone who’s loved me or came even close.
I’m alone and that’s it. The End.


Fit

Fit into this box, they say,
They push my head on down.
Now carry this and now balance on that
Perk up, don’t you dare wear a frown!

Run just a little bit farther.
Push just a little bit more.
Don’t forget Tuesday and pull it together
Make sure that you lock all the doors.

Why can’t you be a bit taller?
Your clothes are not perfect tonight.
Bend over farther, now speak even louder
Are you trying to do it just right?

I want to just go far away.
Take the burdens and put down the load
Disappear into nothing, escape what is real
But I can’t find the magical road.


Merry Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
Not a screen was illumined, no keyboards or mouse.
The stockings and lights are still packed away
No one had money to fund a display.
The children are gone in their cars as they went
My dreams were disrupted [so fast as they spent] [by D and B]
As they left me alone all snuggled in bed
They made enough noise to wake up the dead.
When up on the roof I heard such a clatter,
It’s only the squirrels, they’ve gotten much fatter.
The moon has stopped shining sixteen hours ago,
For I stayed up late with my laptop aglow.
There wasn’t a reason to wake up on time.
No presents were wrapped, I haven’t a dime.
The cats thought the day should be special indeed,
They left me some puke, “Oh that’s what I need!”
I went back to bed, and Zero came with.
And all day we sat, the whole twenty-fifth.
So all of you people on facebook I see
With your happy kids smiling and such lovely trees,
I’m here all alone with no one in sight,
I may as well go to bed for the night.


My Pain

Does no one see the pain I bear?
Is it that they just don’t care?
Here I sit in agony
While they smile rejoicingly
Can’t they turn around and look
And see the joyfulness they took?
Don’t they see that as I cry
A piece inside me wants to die?
Sometimes one will glance behind
And stop and be a little kind
But never stay to help the pain
I seem to lose but never gain
If only one would turn around
And free me from the chains I’m bound
A happy person I would be
But that day I’ll never see


My Eyes

Look in my eyes and you will see
The anger and furry that swells up in me
You’ll see all the hatred and pain and fear
You’ll see not a person who is even near
Can look very hard but you’ll never find
One single person that is always kind
Something that you’ll never see in my eyes
Although my appearance throws up a disguise
Happiness never is truly inside
Security, peacefulness never abides
Nothing is happy that’s found in my eyes
Might as well be like the rest and pass by


So Lonely

Loneliness cuts in my heart like a knife
It seems to have been there throughout all my life
No matter what happiness comes in my grasp
I never can hold it and end up in lack
So many times I have tried to have joy
Others can play with it just like a toy
Somehow I’m doomed from heaven above
To never have anyone with me to love
I look for the future and hold on to hope
But meanwhile I’m finding it’s so hard to cope
If no one will come and take me away
I might as well quit and give up today


Hiding

The moon is but a misty haze
It dare not show its light
It hides behind a cloud of fog
And stays there all the night

It’s so afraid as yet am I
To show the truth of love
The special person doesn’t know
What I am thinking of

I wish the world that I could glow
And show my love to him
But I am scared he’ll run away
Instead I must keep dim

One day I know that I will shine
No matter what the cost
And like a full moon shining bright
No longer I’ll be lost


Mimickers

People are watching
Though you’ll never see
It might just surprise you
How intent they may be

They copy your lifestyles
And mimic your ways
They wish they were like you
In work or at play

Determine within them
And make as their goal
Exactly be like you
Perfect and whole

But if they became you
Just what would you see?
Would you be happy
With what they would be?

Take a step back
And just try to see
If you’re an example
Like you ought to be