Wind is my drug.
My hands are up in the breeze and I can feel tingles on my arm hairs as we come to a stop.
I wave hi to strangers as we pass and give the sign as other bikes go by.
The air has the stickiness of the summer night in every breath.
My feet wiggle as the smile grows across my face so wide, you know this is my happy place.
All I can hear is the RUM of the bike and the WOOSH of the wind in my ears.
For a moment, I have no troubles.
For a moment, all is well.
For just a moment, I can fly.
So much has happened in the last week!
I’ve gone riding with Art. I went camping and boating at Castle Rock Lake last weekend. TM came to visit and spent a day with me. We rode on his bike and went to eat and just talked and talked forever.
What I forgot to mention here is that I am now collared. The collar I have is temporary, but the contract between me and JM is signed and it’s official. There are not many rules, but the ones that I have, I love. I got to spend last night and morning with JM. Every time I visit, I swear he learns my body more and more and does things and takes my body farther than anyone ever has before. It is beyond my wildest dreams of ecstasy. Today, I am sore…. ever so sore. But, I love the way he feels and he treats me very well. We just need to find him a better paying job with less hours!
I grew up on roller skates. When I’m back on them, I feel free. I feel young again. I am fast and smooth and the wind blows my hair back with my speed. Skating is one of my happy spots. It lifts me from any mood.
Tonight Jonell, Ron, Don and I relived a day from our youth again and tore around the rink. I’m more sore than I could ever describe, but it’s TOTALLY worth it. My cookies made it obtainable. What would I do without them?
I am going to bed with my heart happy and my soul filled.
All of my friends walk with their better half
While I am still dancing alone.
Of course they have stories behind all their jokes
They always have texts on their phone.
Someone to cuddle on rainy, sad days
Someone to care if they’re down
They always have someone to take out to eat
And someone to straighten their crown.
And here I am sitting alone in this house
Writing this sad, little poem.
While all of the happy, young couples are out
I’m doomed to be always alone.
Delusions have faded and all that is left
Is a detailed report for the site of the theft.
The dreams that once held up her chin ever high
Are buried and all that is left is a sigh.
The great celebration is only a farce.
Puppets and actors all playing their part.
Pull back the curtain to see with your eyes
The sad little girl as she quietly cries.
The cute little story that’s told with such glee
Has broken her spirit most eloquently.
The step that is left is to pick a new mask
That giggles and smiles for the next rugged task.
It hurts when people fade away. I get used to touching base with certain people daily and when it’s suddenly not reciprocated, it wounds me. I would never want to force someone to interact with me, I want them to want to reach out to me.
So, I must let go of AR and SK. They both mean so much to me, but they started dating others that are taking up their time. Alas, the trials of a monogamous mind!
In the meantime, JM is ever more wonderful. I am on my way to be collared. That has been a dream for me for many, many years. I am counting down the days until I am with him again. Time seems to not go by fast enough.
It’s been a long week housesitting for Justin & Kristi. Six of their dogs plus zero, 6 ferrets (1 with an injured eye), a chinchilla, a bearded dragon and a fish tank. I also somehow started cleaning and organizing. I am craving some alone time.
I had a chance to get out a few times for some brief social interaction. I am looking forward to JM coming here tonight. He will be here in 3 hours. The time cannot go fast enough! We will be going to watch fireworks. I’m looking forward to his smile and his touch and his gaze upon me. My soul has missed his.